Tools to Help The Healing Process After A Toxic or Narcissistic Abusive Relationship

A New Beginning

We often feel defeated, lost or confused and definitely angry once the relationship is over.

Now comes the healing process.

Most likely, I will be posting about this often, because it is very important to take care of yourself.

Here are some ideas to help you along the way.

Journaling – Get your thoughts and feelings on paper. You will have up days and down days, and that is completely normal. Writing daily about your thoughts, feelings, and emotions is very therapeutic; it makes you feel better, giving you a greater understanding of what you experienced.

Holding in emotions will only make you feel worse.

Counseling – Talking to a professional, especially one who specializes in Narcissistic Abuse and Trauma, is essential. You want someone who will listen to you and guide you through the steps to healing. You may notice that after the first two sessions, you feel worse; this is a common occurrence, but do not get discouraged. It will get better.

Medication– Speak to your primary care physician, be honest, and tell them how you feel. Ask if a low-dose antidepressant is advised or another alternative to help if you are experiencing anxiety.

Meditation– Look for a quiet, distraction-free, relaxing space.

For those seeking a meditation and relaxation app, Calm is an excellent choice. They offer a trial version.

Self-Care – Focusing on yourself is vital, both mentally and physically. It is not selfish.

Write A Letter to yourself as well as your Ex – A letter to yourself can be a way to forgive yourself for everything you allowed because you didn’t set boundaries. You may have dismissed their behavior, not realizing the impact of toxic relationships, emotional abuse, or narcissism. Remember, you deserve so much better.

Writing a letter to your ex can be a way to express your feelings, including the disrespect and pain you’ve endured from their cowardly treatment. Let the words flow. Once you have finished writing the letters, consider burning them.

Delete photos of the two of you – Looking at them will only cause more pain and give you false hope of them possibly trying to reach out again. If you review those pictures, you’ll likely see the pain behind those eyes and come to realize that you were never happy when you were with them.

Delete and block their number and contact – This will not be easy, but it is necessary as you move forward. Be sure to block them on social media as well.

Reach out to Family and Friends – When you were with the Narcissist, they isolated you from those close to you. It is time to reconnect!

Yoga – This aligns with self-care and can be practiced at home if a yoga studio is not accessible. You can find great sessions on YouTube

Here is one I personally recommend: https://yogawithadriene.com/

Self-Reflect – You are not to blame for what happened, but understanding that they chose you for a reason, they knew you did not have proper boundaries in place, and the knowledge. You may have been a people pleaser, ignored the red flags, or been codependent.

This changes when you are healing, you understand what to watch for, know your worth, and set clear, strict boundaries.

Remember, A toxic individual is broken; it is not your responsibility to fix them.

Walk away, do not look back.

Let Them Go!!

I hope that this post was helpful to you.

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Narcissistic Manipulator

The Puppet Master

Let’s face it, a Narcissist or a toxic person can be great at distorting the truth; they take pleasure in manipulating anyone, even their own family, but of course, if you are out of the “situationship” with the narcissist, have emerged from the Narcissistic Fog or maybe even dodged The Love Bombing Stage. You know what I am talking about.

If you don’t, you soon will!

A Narcissist loves the chase, the control they can have over you, every aspect of your life. It even affects your decision-making as well as your memory. Personal space or privacy? That does not exist to the Narcissist, but they will demand it from you, going so far as to lock you out of your own room.

They control who you talk to, isolate you from friends and family. It feels like you are being held prisoner, oftentimes in your own home.

They demand your undivided attention, adoration, and praise. If you are using your phone, taking a call. They want to know who you are talking to. Try to do that to a Narcissist and you will be met with a temper tantrum or silent treatment, another manipulation tactic.

Another common tactic used for manipulation is Gaslighting, which leaves you to question your own reality.

Once you start realizing your worth and the abuse you have encountered, you will understand that what you have gone through was domestic abuse. Begin the process of educating yourself about Narcissistic Abuse Awareness, The Red Flags to look out for, and regain your independence, your sense of self.

This has made you a stronger person, someone who will not be manipulated, used, ridiculed, or taken advantage of. Ever again.

You are an incredible person, deserving of so much better. You matter.

Remember that.

I hope this information has been helpful. Feel free to share it with anyone who might find it informative.

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