Tag: Pets and The Narcissist

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What Angers the Narcissist?

Are They Jealous?

A Narcissist can be bothered by the most minute things, and it appears out of nowhere. Their moods can be compared to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

They think that they are superior to everyone else and they hate being corrected, when they get constructive criticism, or being wrong. Especially from a higher authority.

Competitive? Definitely! They hate to lose!

A Narcissist is like a child, wanting all the toys, when they get something new, this is their opportunity to brag about it too. Something they love to do. A lot.

They hate when people are late.

You will notice when they get behind the wheel, severe road rage! That can be incredibly scary!

They hate it when you are sick, it means that they have to take on the responsibility of caring for you as well as your children, if you have them. If your children get sick, the reaction is the same.

The Narcissist is not the focus; this makes them angry.

If you or your children have made any major accomplishments, this angers them to the point where they may belittle anything to try to upset you. A time in your life when you should be proud. Yes, they are not only jealous of you; they are also envious of your children.

Anytime you don’t pay attention to them, they get angry.

The emphasis should consistently be on them. Remember, they thrive on attention, adoration, admiration, and constant validation.

They get angry if you leave them alone, or when you ask for help, even to fix something. You will get excuses or a tantrum. Yet they make you dependent on them.

Early in the relationship, they were more than willing to help you, but as time went on, in their eyes, you became a burden to them, and that made them angry.

My motto was, if you want something done, figure it out and do it yourself.

A narcissist reacts with anger when they are exposed; they despise being discovered.

When you tell them No and set clear boundaries,  going No Contact.

When you move on and are happy.

You are not asking for too much, they just offer you too little. The bare minimum.

Their irrational behavior makes you anxious and feel like you are constantly walking on eggshells or merely keeping the peace.

Their anger issues only get worse with age, along with their sense of entitlement or delusion.  I  did a post about this, The Aging Narcissist

Anyone experiencing Narcissistic Abuse may be familiar with this.

Please don’t blame yourself. 

If you are in a Narcissistic Abusive situation, please seek immediate assistance by contacting your local police or domestic violence hotline.

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The Changing Narcissist

Photo by Egor Kamelev on Pexels.com

The Chameleon

Like the chameleon, a Narcissist is always changing to either fit in with everyone or hide who they really are.

A Narcissist will almost always change their taste in music, what they wear, and how they present themselves in front of others. Especially if it is to gain supply.

The hobbies or interests you have may suddenly also interest them. If you like photography

They will have an interest in it.

Some of the music you enjoy listening to will be played around you because they like it now. Of course, there will be times when they dislike it and will be vocal about it.

After a while, you find that the interests you once had are pushed aside, no longer enjoyable, because you are either being forced to do them or just too tired to do anything, since being with a Narcissist or a toxic person.

They have drained you.

Now you will notice a change. A Covert Narcissist, especially, will start to act indifferently towards you. You spend less and less time together. Yes, you will receive the occasional breadcrumbing to see if you are still interested, which will lead you to believe that everything is fine. it is not. This is part of their playbook.

They are focusing on a new supply. Your replacement. The next phase of the Narcissistic Cycle is always the Discard. The biggest change to their personality you will ever see and never forget. Their true self. The person behind the mask.

Time to shift the focus to you.

Self-Care Is Not Selfish

Looking ahead, now is a great opportunity to rediscover yourself, focus on your mental and physical health. The person you once were no longer exists.

Mourn what you thought “What could have been,” and know that you have a new start. Freedom.

Start doing what you enjoy. I mention this many times on different posts because it is important.

What have you always wanted to do but were held back by the Narcissist? You can do that now.

Read or listen to a good book. Start a journal whatever you want to do.

One thing I hear a lot about is doing Shadow Work healing and working on yourself. Personally, I enjoy learning about Stoicism

It is also beneficial in the healing process; you may discover tools that work specifically for you.

We need to educate ourselves, as well as others, about Narcissism and the many types to be aware of, not ignoring the signs. A narcissist can only hide behind many masks for so long before they become too burdensome.

We can change for the better, grow, and learn through this painful but necessary life lesson. While a Narcissist will never change for the better, unless they understand something within them is not right, and they get help.

They will only get worse and bitter as the cycle continues.

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The Benefits of Journaling

Photo by Jessica Lewis 🦋 thepaintedsquare on Pexels.com

Part Of The Process Post-Narcissist Discard

If you have never started a journal, now is a great time to start! Journaling doesn’t require much time; it can be done first thing in the morning or before you sleep. There is no specific time to journal, and it is very therapeutic.

If you go to counseling, they may suggest starting a journal.

I have included some suggested links if you are wondering where to start. A good quality, comfortable writing pen is essential; you don’t need anything fancy. The link to the pens I personally use is below.

The same applies to your journal, whether it is hardcover, It can even be a simple notebook.

The point is. It is what you are comfortable with.

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Writing about what you experienced with the Narcissist can bring out a range of emotions that were most likely kept hidden. Sometimes writing about what you endured, and yes, you endured a lot!

With time and reflection, a clearer understanding will emerge. It’s all part of the journey.

Let those feelings out.

When you are done journaling, just be sure to keep it in a safe place!

I know that journaling is not for everyone, and it is okay. There are other tools you can use in the healing process, maybe a new hobby or interest that you put aside when you were with the Narcissist?

I hope this post was helpful to you in some way. Please, like, share, comment, and follow me on social media to stay updated, so you never miss future content!

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The Sneaky Way a Narcissist Tries to Control You

Can We Be Friends?

The one question you thought you would never be asked by your ex, but here it is: “Can we be friends”? This is the person who tried to destroy you, mentally and physically. Treated you as if you meant nothing to them. Now they want to be friends?

Let us be honest, do you believe this is genuine?

This is just their way of continuing to control you, manipulate you. See if you will take them back. This is someone you want nothing to do with.

You don’t need them; if anything, they need you. It is only for supply.

If you are worried about being alone, you already were when you and the Narcissist were together. They were never there for you.

They are with their new or recycled supply, perhaps even married to them, and they claim to be happy. Are they trying to convince you, or themselves?

Besides, you are moving forward, taking care of yourself, and shifting the focus to what you want to do. You have a newfound freedom and a clear understanding of what you experienced when you were with the Narcissist.

I hope this helped you in some way. If you are going through this right now, you are stronger because of what you experienced. You will be okay.

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Pets and The Narcissist

Unconditional Love? Not From A Narcissist

Pets offer their owners love, protection, and loyalty and only want that in return.

They are very instinctive. They can tell when something is not right. Some have been known to sense that their owners are sick, and they are protective when they sense danger.

The Narcissist appears caring and concerned and helps you take care of the pet until the novelty wears off and the responsibility falls on you.

This is usually when you see the mask of the Narcissist begin to slip, you are focusing the attention on your pet, not the Narcissist who acts like a child having a tantrum. They get angry because they are not the main focus of your attention.

They start to isolate and ignore you. This causes confusion and worry. You wonder if you once again have done something wrong to cause their strange behavior. This tactic leaves you feeling like you are walking on eggshells.

You did nothing wrong.

This is Narcissistic Abuse

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