The Chameleon
Like the chameleon, a Narcissist is always changing to either fit in with everyone or hide who they really are.
A Narcissist will almost always change their taste in music, what they wear, and how they present themselves in front of others. Especially if it is to gain supply.
The hobbies or interests you have may suddenly also interest them. If you like photography
They will have an interest in it.
Some of the music you enjoy listening to will be played around you because they like it now. Of course, there will be times when they dislike it and will be vocal about it.
After a while, you find that the interests you once had are pushed aside, no longer enjoyable, because you are either being forced to do them or just too tired to do anything, since being with a Narcissist or a toxic person.
They have drained you.
Now you will notice a change. A Covert Narcissist, especially, will start to act indifferently towards you. You spend less and less time together. Yes, you will receive the occasional breadcrumbing to see if you are still interested, which will lead you to believe that everything is fine. it is not. This is part of their playbook.
They are focusing on a new supply. Your replacement. The next phase of the Narcissistic Cycle is always the Discard. The biggest change to their personality you will ever see and never forget. Their true self. The person behind the mask.
Time to shift the focus to you.
Self-Care Is Not Selfish
Looking ahead, now is a great opportunity to rediscover yourself, focus on your mental and physical health. The person you once were no longer exists.
Mourn what you thought “What could have been,” and know that you have a new start. Freedom.
Start doing what you enjoy. I mention this many times on different posts because it is important.
What have you always wanted to do but were held back by the Narcissist? You can do that now.
Read or listen to a good book. Start a journal whatever you want to do.
One thing I hear a lot about is doing Shadow Work healing and working on yourself. Personally, I enjoy learning about Stoicism
It is also beneficial in the healing process; you may discover tools that work specifically for you.
We need to educate ourselves, as well as others, about Narcissism and the many types to be aware of, not ignoring the signs. A narcissist can only hide behind many masks for so long before they become too burdensome.
We can change for the better, grow, and learn through this painful but necessary life lesson. While a Narcissist will never change for the better, unless they understand something within them is not right, and they get help.
They will only get worse and bitter as the cycle continues.
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Up From The Ashes 