Nothing is as it appears
It is the beginning of the relationship, and everything is going great. You spend time together, and interestingly enough, you share the same interests. What could be more perfect?
It appears to those around you the relationship is moving very fast, but they do not tell you that. This is a form of control, but is misunderstood by you as them to appear loving and caring, far from it!
As the relationship progresses you meet their family and friends and all appears to be going well, aside from the subtle insults disguised as compliments. For those who have experienced this, you totally understand what I mean.
They will comment on how you are dressing, how you act, and your appearance. These are also the things that they seemed to like about you.
The insults become increasingly hurtful and hateful behind closed doors. In front of others, they look playful and are thought to be cute or funny.
Once the mask begins to slip, they can no longer control you and probably already have someone else. They will discard you at the worst possible time, remember, this was the plan all along.
If you decide to leave them, never tell them your plan. They will use whatever leverage they have to guilt you into staying. Get help, go no contact, if you can, and go as far away as possible. Somewhere safe.
They are not sorry, they will never change, and the problem is never addressed, instead, you will be blamed again. They only get worse and so does the abuse.
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Up From The Ashes 